Since there is no actual blog that I can “reblog” or even point to as a link, I’m going to copy the article here and quote it. I will point you to where I found this but the content changes so often, it may be tough to find… thus my quoting: My thoughts will be below.
The following content DOES NOT belong to me. It can be found HERE
Ramblings from the Dad Side
So, What’s the Problem, Victoria?
By Dave Nicholson
Over the past year or so, my 14-year-old daughter, Keri, has gotten into the habit of coming to work with me a couple days a week. I’ve got a spare office, and she likes the peace and productivity available when she’s separated from her nine-year-old brother by 20 miles or so for a few hours. She’s always glad to get home at the end of the day, but for those eight hours or so there’s a whole lot of focus going on.
While we don’t get to engage much while we’re at the office, the 25-minute commute each way is a different story. Since I’m a bit of a political junkie who has a few opinions on the state of the nation and culture, a simple question from her about what math curriculum she should use next semester can easily end up in a long-winded diatribe on the evils of Common Core and an overreaching federal government. We’ve agreed that she’ll probably have some sort of permanent psychological damage from this much exposure to her opinionated father, but we both get to laugh at me, and I’m ready to put it down on her high school transcripts as intro to social and political science. I could be wrong, but I’m even a little suspicious that some of her questions may just be red meat she waves in front of me in order to get class rolling.
Here’s an example: Last week, we were rolling peacefully down the road when she tosses out a simple question. Like rolling a hand grenade over to my side of the car she says, “So, dad, what’s the problem with Victoria’s Secret again?”
As the father of two daughters whom I adore, and the father of two sons who are likely to marry someone else’s daughters, the soft-core porn advertising of stores like Victoria’s Secret or Abercrombie & Fitch really ticks me off. While the hard-core porn industry has to hide the worst of its product behind the doors of sleazy adult book stores on the sides of the interstate highway system, the mall-based marketing of trendy fashion vendors has no similar constraints. Their version of the same message – that women exist to be used and are of value only to the extent that they can be dressed up to elicit a lustful response – is being mainstreamed with amazing effectiveness and with little opposition that I can see. Did I mention that these people tick me off?
One of my daughter’s friends recently opined that Victoria’s Secret was an underwear store, and everybody needs underwear, so what’s the big deal? One of her teachers at our co-op gave her a couple jars of Victoria’s Secret lotion for Christmas, everybody needs hand and body lotion…right? Except that these stores aren’t selling underwear, or lotion, or sweatshirts. That may be the product that is in the bag when you leave the store, but what they are selling is a worldview, a perspective and a values system. Is it yours?
When I do business with a company, I provide them revenue and encouragement to do more of what they’re doing. When Abercrombie stitches their logo onto the back of your daughter’s sweatpants, what are they selling, and do you really want to provide the billboard space for that ad?
I had a big, long answer for Keri’s hand grenade of a question. Maybe she agrees with me, maybe she doesn’t. But she’s asking the right questions and we get the opportunity on the car ride home to grapple with them together. I like that.
Dave Nicholson, his wife Deann, and their four children, ages 9 to 20, are living (and loving!) the homeschool life in suburban Chicago.You can reach Dave via email: Ramblings@Home-School-Inc.com.
I could jump in with a comment about the evils of common-core myself but I’ll save that for another time. For today, I want to speak about the other issue Mr Nicholson mentions…
I have an 11 year old son.
And my 11 year old son is an outstanding young man already! Though he is getting a bit tired of having to cover his eyes when we drive by certain billboards on the way home, or as we walk by certain stores in the mall (one reason we don’t visit the mall very often AT ALL).
Five years ago, we began visiting a church where nearly every woman wore long skirts on Sundays and Wednesdays – and being the nervous social person that I am (thanks high school!), I felt more comfortable in skirts and so we bought some skirts to wear to church.
One day… on a whim, I put on a skirt to just wear at home. I could never have anticipated the chain of events I set in motion that day.
All day… I heard how beautiful I looked in that skirt!
“Mom, you look so beautiful in that skirt.”
“Mom, I wish you’d wear skirts more often. I really like it.”
“Mom, you should wear that all the time. You look so nice.”
“Mom, please tell grandma to buy you some more skirts so you can wear them all the time.”
“Mom, please think about wearing skirts more?”
Who could deny such sweet, loving, wonderful, flattering words – especially from their sweet little boy with that sweet crescent-eyed smile?
A note to husbands here… if you want your wife to dress a certain way, try complimenting her A LOT when she’s wearing an outfit like you hope she’ll wear more of. And try a variation when she’s wearing something you don’t like: “Honey, you look nice but… that other outfit REALLY brings out your beauty!”
“You catch more flies with honey than you do with vinegar.” is an expression for a reason – IT’S TRUE!
Anyway, I found myself wearing skirts more and more and more and more and I discovered several things when I did.
– I felt more feminine in a skirt, more attractive, more presentable – a denim skirt looks a LOT dressier than a pair of jeans.
– I felt as if I was taken more seriously. People looked at me very differently. I’m still not sure if it’s the clothes or the new self-assurance I feel wearing them or a combination of both but I like it!
– Skirts are FUN! I found out that you are NEVER too old to twirl! (for the record, I do suggest wearing bike shorts or capris under your skirt if you are a klutz like me and tend to fall a lot – this also helps on windy days… or if you’re twirling)
I could go on and on but the reasoning has to be your own or you won’t truly appreciate why you’re doing it. Plus, the reasonings will be different for every person!
So what does this have to do with my son having to cover his eyes when we walk past certain stores or drive by certain billboards?
He had more respect for women at age 7 than most grown men I’ve known in my lifetime!
He does NOT like to see women spread out on a billboard wearing practically nothing, or giant posters of women in their underwear. He came up with this with very little interference from me and that is why I KNOW it came from GOD, and from his studies, reading the Bible and watching inspirational videos.
He actually gets angry when we watch a “Christian” movie and the actresses are not dressed appropriately. “Don’t they know they’re a role model, Mom?”
And sadly, I have to answer “Yes, but not all people who are saved, listen to everything God tells them. The world has convinced so many people that it’s OK to dress any way you want.” And Christians are drinking the same Kool-Aid… and buying into the same line as millions of other women who think it’s OK to wear absolutely anything they want.
There is also a line Mr Nicholson mentioned that absolutely makes my blood boil!
Their version of the same message – that women exist to be used and are of value only to the extent that they can be dressed up to elicit a lustful response – is being mainstreamed with amazing effectiveness and with little opposition that I can see. Did I mention that these people tick me off?
I am a feminist! However, my ideas about how feminism should work DO NOT line up with almost anyone else’s!
I AM NOT A PIECE OF MEAT!
Neither is my sweet little girl! And I can tell you this! The man she marries WILL NOT be one of these men that works so hard to convince women that he has to look at porn. It’s only natural. Everybody does it. It will spice up their relationship.
WOMEN – I am here to tell you that these are ALL VICIOUS VICIOUS LIES!!!
If he is looking at porn ANYWHERE, he is NOT the man for you!
And my 8 year old daughter is already so much smarter than I was in my teens and twenties. She already knows what she wants in a man… and what SHE DOES NOT WANT!
My question is this: HOW!?!
How are supposed femenists allowing this kind of nonsense… even worse – participating, promoting and propelling this kind of nonsense!
Yes, blood is boiling…
No I’m not done.
There is too much to say! WAY TOO Much!
But I think, for now anyway. that I need to back away slowly and take some deep breaths.
So… until next time…